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Friday, 25 February 2011 14:56

Put that on a T-shirt and wear it!

Okay, so I’m one of those people who thinks through hypothetical conversations. Now I know most scenarios will never materialize, but I nevertheless enjoy the “just in case” exercise. As a kid, I would get really pissed when by some random turn of events, the rehearsed conversation would come to fruition and the other party had the nerve to go off script. These days I’ve succumbed to the idea that people think for themselves, and instead apply my internal narrations to more practical things like blogging, or game night. 

Published in Sapient Salesman
Friday, 18 February 2011 20:45

Caught on my Heels

I stem from a competitive family. Whether it’s my mom and I battling over the best credit score, my dad and I comparing IQ test results, or all three of us competing for the best bowling average, a single point can be the difference between mocking and mockery. After years of play we pretty much know where we stand relative to each other, and infrequently fail to foresee defeat. Which is why it really burns when you know it’s coming but you do and can do anything to stop it. 

Published in Sapient Salesman
Friday, 11 February 2011 17:55

When Details Fight Back

While under deadline to finish painting my office/the bar before the Super Bowl, I took a bit of a stumble. You see, as a short person the standard two-step ladder provides insufficient elevation forcing me to engineer something better, and three milk crates provide ideal altitude. I perfected this structure during last year’s remodel of my bedroom. Step one: stake out a Walgreen’s, Frat House, or grocery store and figure out when their dairy shipments arrive. Then simply stop by the night before and borrow five crates for your project: three for the main structure and two as a step up. I erroneously believed the final step of the setup, tying the crates together for easy transport, was optional, so I skipped it. Then two thirds of my way around the room during a routine dismount the crates separated and I began to fall.

Longest 2 seconds ever! 

Published in Sapient Salesman
Friday, 04 February 2011 17:39

Geeks Finally Gettin’ Some Glory

Shortly before my 16th birthday, following a Calculus lecture on integrals, I discussed a problem with a friend that asked us to determine the time until impact of a projectile based on the rate of change of the object's shadow. For the purposes of this story you can ignore why math frequently sneaks its way into my conversations, but as you might imagine, there was mocking involved. When challenged to deliver a practical application for this calculation, I came up with the following totally plausible scenario: say Freddy Kruger is chasing you and after you manage to duck behind a bush you wonder how much time you have left to live... without Calculus you wouldn't know until it was too late! 

Published in Sapient Salesman

Erin Wilson is the author and publisher of the Sapient Salesman

A "sapient salesman"?

 A sapient salesman is tasked with being a psychologist, technologist, empathist, humorist, conversationalist, and a dozen other “ists” in the course of practicing their salescraft. Most people can’t wear that many hats, and these tidbits are designed to minimize your millinery mandates. Read more

The Book

Look for The Sapient Salesman: Spinning Life into Lessons, One Tale at a Time on later this year!

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